I Dare You Not to Bore Me with the Bible

by Michael S. Heiser

Publishers:

Lexham Press; Bible Study Magazine

, 2014

If It’s Weird, It’s Important

The Bible is filled with passages that are so baffling we tend to ignore them. Yet the passages that seem weird might be the most important. This collection of essays from Bible Study Magazine will shock you, intrigue you, and completely change the way you view the Bible. Dr. Michael S. Heiser visits some of the Bible’s most obscure passages, unveiling their ancient context to help you interpret them today. Read this book, and you’ll never be bored by the Bible again.

Contents

• Part One: Old Testament
  • The Ancient’s Guide to the Galaxy
  • Walk Like an Israelite
  • Even the Bible Needed Upgrading
  • Spellchecking the Bible
  • Why Circumcision?
  • The Abandoned Child and the Basket Case
  • A Tale of Courage We Never Teach
  • Counting the Ten Commandments
  • Is There Really a Sin Offering?
  • There’s a Devil in the Details
  • Love Potion: Numbers 5
  • Is My Bible Right?
  • The Most Horrific Bible Story
  • Righting a Wrong
  • When Giants Walked the Earth
  • The Divine Arrow
  • Promise Undelivered?
  • Sanctified Dirt
  • 1003 BC Census: Who Authorized It—God or Satan?
  • Cookin’ the Book
  • Slaying the Sea Monster
  • Does God Need a Co-Signer? The Witness in the Clouds
  • Who Wrote the Book of Proverbs?
  • Immanuel’s Mother: Virgin or Not?
  • Standing in the Council
  • Jeremiah: Double Vision?
  • Why the Ark of the Covenant Will Never Be Found
  • He, Him, Me, Myself, and I
  • Bizarre Visions for the Worst of Times
  • Do the Dead Sea Scrolls Answer the Canon Question?

• Part Two: New Testament
  • Burying Hell
  • My Guardian Angel
  • The New Testament Misquotes the Old Testament?
  • “I Saw Satan Fall like Lightning”: When?
  • The Healing Serpent
  • Who Took Verse 4 out of My Bible?
  • What Walking on Water Really Means
  • Born Again . . . and Again and Again?
  • Dumbledore Meets Philip & Peter
  • Paul’s Lost Letters
  • Destiny & Destination
  • A Female Apostle
  • Signed, Sealed, and Delivered—to Satan?
  • Treason & Translation
  • Charlton Heston Had Company
  • When Abraham Met Jesus
  • How Many Times Is Jesus Coming Back?
  • What’s Jesus Waiting For?
  • God’s Right-Hand Woman? Wisdom in Hebrews 1
  • Baptism as Spiritual Warfare
  • Jesus Is God: Jude and Peter Tell Me So
  • When Angels Do Time
  • Tough Love
  • Jesus, God, a.k.a., The Name
  • 666: What Theories Add Up?
  • Perspective Changes Everything
  • Constantine, Conspiracy, and the Canon

Top Highlights

“Everyone in Abraham’s household witnessed the miracle of Isaac’s birth. From that point on, every male understood why they had been circumcised: Their entire race—their very existence—began with a miraculous act of God. Every woman was reminded of this when she had sexual relations with her Israelite husband and when her sons were circumcised. Circumcision was a visible, continuous reminder that Israel owed its existence to Yahweh, who created them out of nothing.” (Page 18)

“While God’s Word was written for us, it wasn’t written to us.” (Page ix)

“The Israelites believed in a universe that was common among the ancient civilizations of the biblical world. It encompassed three parts: a heavenly realm, an earthly realm for humans, and an underworld for the dead. These three tiers are reflected in the Ten Commandments: ‘You shall not make for yourself a carved image, or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth’ (Exod 20:4).” (Page 3)

“The miraculous nature of Isaac’s birth is the key to understanding circumcision as the sign of the covenant.” (Page 18)

“The evidence suggests that circumcision did not distinguish Israelite men from their foreign neighbors.” (Page 17)

Product Details

• Title: I Dare You Not to Bore Me with the Bible
• Author: Michael S. Heiser
• Publisher: Lexham Press
• Publication Date: 2014
• Pages: 218
• Format: Logos Digital, Paperback
• Trim Size: 5x8
• ISBN: 9781577995395

About Michael S. Heiser

Dr. Michael S. Heiser (PhD, University of Wisconsin-Madison, Hebrew and Semitic Studies) was a former Scholar-in-Residence for Faithlife Corporation, the makers of Logos Bible Software. He then served as the Executive Director of the Awakening School of Theology and Ministry. His varied academic background enabled him to operate in the realm of critical scholarship and the wider Christian community. His experience in teaching at the undergraduate level and writing for the layperson both directly contributed to Logos’ goal of adapting scholarly tools for’nonspecialists.

Dr. Heiser earned his PhD in Hebrew Bible and Semitic languages and holds an MA in ancient history and Hebrew studies. He was the coeditor of Old Testament Greek Pseudepigrapha with Morphology and Semitic Inscriptions: Analyzed Texts and English Translations, and he was able to do translation work in roughly a dozen ancient languages, including Biblical Hebrew, Greek, Aramaic, Egyptian hieroglyphs, and Ugaritic cuneiform. He specialized in Israelite religion (especially Israel’s divine council), contextualizing biblical theology with Israelite and ancient Near Eastern religion, Jewish binitarianism, biblical languages, ancient Semitic languages, textual criticism, comparative philology, and Second Temple period Jewish literature. In 2007 he was named the Pacific Northwest Regional Scholar by the Society of Biblical Literature.

Dr. Heiser authored several best-selling books, including The Unseen Realm: Recovering the Supernatural Worldview of the Bible and Reversing Hermon: Enoch, the Watchers, and the Forgotten Mission of Jesus Christ. He was host of the popular Naked Bible Podcast and served as the Executive Director of the Awakening School of Theology and Ministry in Jacksonville, FL.