Reconcile: Conflict Transformation for Ordinary Christians
Ebook
Overview
“Emotionally powerful and full of practical advice and resources.”
—PUBLISHERS WEEKLYReconcile: Conflict Transformation for Ordinary Christians,by international mediator John Paul Lederach serves as a guidebook for Christians seeking a scriptural view of reconciliation and practical steps for transforming conflict.
Originally published as The Journey Toward Reconciliation and based on Lederach’s work in war zones on five continents, this revised and updated book tells dramatic stories of what works—and what doesn’t—in entrenched conflicts between individuals and groups. Lederach leads readers through stories of conflict and reconciliation in Scripture, using these stories as anchors for peacemaking strategies that Christians can put into practice in families and churches.
Lederach, who has written twenty-two books and whose work has been translated into more than twelve languages, also offers new lenses through which to view conflict, whether congregational conflicts or global terrorism. A new section of resources, created by mediation professionals, professors, and pastors, offers tools for understanding interpersonal, church, and global conflict, worship resources, books and websites for further study, and invitations to action in everyday life.
Free downloadable study guide available here.
Product Details
- Title : Reconcile: Conflict Transformation for Ordinary Christians
- Author: Lederach, John Paul
- Publisher: Herald Press
- Publication Date: 2014
- ISBN: 9780836199345
When faced with conflict, many of us in the church operate by a series of understood but unexpressed rules and guidelines. I call them the “Unspoken Ten Commandments of Conflict in the Church.” The Unspoken Commandments are not exclusive to church circles; social scientists would suggest that they are rooted in a series of common dynamics that accompany conflict as it escalates.
This list looks with humor at our behavior, but I believe these Unspoken Commandments describe many people’s experiences. Such patterns may even come too close for comfort. In part, that is because these commandments connect with some typical responses that form the underpinnings, not of what we say we believe, but of what we actually do with conflict. What we actually do is our practice, or praxis.
Conflict is painful and messy. We may deal with the uncertainty of messiness on a theological level by suggesting that conflict is primarily a question of sin, “their” sin. At a personal level, we deal with the pain and anxiety by finding a variety of clever ways to avoid facing the conflict. We find justifications for moving away from rather than toward conflict. Too often we adjust our theology to match what we actually do. To support avoidance, we cite biblical clauses, using them detached from their context: “Have nothing more to do with anyone who causes divisions” (Titus 3:10).
Unspoken Ten Commandments of Conflict in the Church:
1. Thou shalt be nice. Always be nice. Yea, I say unto thee, “niceness” is the essence of Christianity.
2. Thou shalt not confront each other in public. Confrontation is nasty and unmanageable. If ever in doubt about confrontation, refer to commandment number one.
3. Should thou ever have the distasteful experience of confrontation, thou shalt not listen to thine enemy, but shalt prepare thy defense while the enemy is still speaking. Yea, I say unto thee, listening raises questions that weaken thy defense and may lead to compromise, impurity, and, heaven forbid, self-reflection. It is dangerous to change thy mind or admit that thou wert wrong. Truth is unchangeable.
4. Speak not with contentious folks who disagree with thee or who have raised thy “righteous” anger. Thou shalt seek out and talk to others about them. Yea, more, dear brothers and sisters, speak only with nice people who agree with thee. By speaking only with those with whom thou dost agree, thou wilt experience the true support of community…